Aside from the Process of Individualization which follows, the primary determining factor in human emotional happiness and behavior is a simple matter of SELF-CONTAINMENT and it's absence. For any problem involving such things as INTROVERSION, INABILITY TO PUT ONESELF FORWARD TO OTHERS, LACK OF SELF-CONTROL, HYPERACTIVITY or THE INABILITY TO RELAX, click-on CONTROLLING ONE'S ENERGY.
Click-on THE MENTALLY RETARDED for comments on how to deal with various special cases.
The human 'Mind' is composed of "Universal Mind" ('God' or the Collective Super-Ego) and the four 'Identity-strands' listed in the Spiritual/Metaphysical Level section.. which take turns emerging into conscious awareness as The Process Of Individualization first described by the Swiss Psychoanalyst Carl G. Jung.. PLUS a 'temporary Life-Story' (the EGO-self) portrayed by the Horoscope or Planetary Astrology Chart. That temporary (Astrological) Level we will cover in the section on 'Physical Analysis;' for all of the real 'issues' of self-development are not temporary but EVOLUTIONARY.
All human development ATTEMPTS TO OCCUR in the following Cycle or Process. "Mainstream" human societal patterns, however, are limited (at this time at least) to only the first TWO Stages; full 'completion' of the second Phase produces so powerful a change in the psyche of the individual as to set them apart from (or actually, a bit ABOVE) the societal 'norm' (the 'self-actualized' personality;) while completion of the final Phase has been historically so rare as to create the outstanding individuals whose life-stories fill 'Who's Who' and other catalogs of the 'remarkable.'
From birth until somewhere between eight and fifteen years of age (usually) children spent the majority of their INNER LIVES dealing with THE FREUDIAN "ID".. the Unconscious Mind. This is a vast, dark world of SHADOWS, where strange symbols flicker almost clearly, yet strangely 'mysterious' and slightly "spooky." It is NATURAL to fear the Id! The Id is a VERY powerful part of the human Psyche; it is from within the Id that our Dreams come to us, surfacing IN SYMBOLIC IMAGERY, whatever the Ego or conscious mind is struggling to understand or integrate. Thus, "Monsters!" Also, since the Id is the home of Psychic Forces in general, it symbolizes itself to young minds as Witches, Wizards, Dragons and magical Temples presided-over by masterful sorcerers who are ALL merely symbols of the youngster's own emerging Id-relationship. Carl Jung named this Phase "The Shadow Phase of Individualization" and recognized that each individual must pass THROUGH it successfully in order to be a healthy, fearless person.
If a youngster is NOT able to deal with the fearful images surfaced by the Id, a wide variety of psychic INJURIES can occur; including abnormal FEAR and nervousness that can cause 'fixations' on anything from The Dark to Crowds, Heights, certain Animals or even certain types of People; 'Dependency Patterns' in which the child CLINGS DESPERATELY to the security of a Parental Figure (or religious image, representing that Parental "security-blanket;") and/or 'Fetishism' (including Obsessive-Compulsive behavior) in which certain objects ("fetishes") or Compulsive Behaviors (such as hand-washing or other Rituals) are considered 'necessary' for their safety and survival.. simply because such a technique ONCE helped them escape from a nightmare in the depths of the Id. None of these situations are either 'bad' or 'incurable;' they are simply TOUGH SITUATIONS resulting from one of life's first Tough Lessons. Anyone suffering from any of these problems MAY be somewhat helped by Holistic Counseling.. but they SHOULD also be referred to a professional Psychologist, Psychiatrist or other Therapist specializing in that particular disorder.
As is well-known to most therapists, INNER CONFLICT due to severe religious programming (which labels many ordinary, natural human behaviors as 'unacceptable' and therefore guilt-producing) is at the heart of many such psychic injuries. Attention to religious programming is a wise detail to consider in all mental-emotional issues.
Normally, however, youngsters DO find the self-strength (or Ego-development) necessary to Brave It Out; and slowly they conquer the Shadow.. gaining along the way a symbolic 'understanding' or RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR ID-CONTROLLING SYMBOLS that allow them to pass through this Phase relatively unscathed. Since the Id is really 'just' one's OWN Unconscious Mind, there is really nothing to fear but Oneself and one's Similars.. and this truth dawns on the youngster in time, leading to THE ABILITY TO REMAIN STRONG, SELF-RELIANT AND FEARLESS even in the face of challenging situations and other strong individuals. Since this Phase happens to most of us during what has been called 'the Natural Homosexual Phase of Child Development,' most youngsters experiment with same-gender sexuality-play as part of conquering their own Shadow. This is both 'normal' and perfectly NECESSARY; for it builds the sense of SAFETY with one's own gender-group that will allow them to form deep and lasting LOVE of the form called 'Friendship' with their same-gender friends throughout life.
One of the few things that can really prevent Shadow-Phase Completion (other than the Id-fears already mentioned) is a powerful trauma or injury during the 'sex-play' stage of this Phase; individuals who find it impossible (for reasons ranging from parental or religious judgementalism, to rejection or injury by the playmates one first 'open's up to' during this stage,) to fully integrate the Shadow.. leaving one trapped in the Id's dark domain, running from a Shadow-Wizard who represents one's own frustrated same-gender LOVE, which both frightens and attracts. Such trauma requires specialized Counseling, and some form of 'acceptable outlet' in which the 'enemy' can be finally LOVED and made an Ally.
At around Puberty (usually.. though parental or societal pressure CAN cause this to occur as early as six or eight years of age..) we enter the Phase of life when we focus our Inner World upon the Freudian LIBIDO (or Psycho-Sexual Identity) through THE OPPOSITE SEX. Carl Jung coined the terms 'Anima' (the Female Beloved of a young Man) and 'Animus' (the Male Beloved of a young Woman) to describe these Inner 'turn-ons' which the Libido brings to our attention. The Libido, of course, is FAR MORE than sexuality; called "Shakti" in Yoga, the Libido is our entire Psycho-Sexual "Light Body" or aura.. a permanent structure described in detail in the PHYSICAL section of this Manual.. though sexuality is Libido's most noticeable early form of expression.
The Libido is an EXTREMELY powerful part of Psyche! It is in fact SO POWERFUL that (if the individual has been trained to think that there are things it 'dare' not resemble on penalty of social 'rejection,') the Libido can OVERWHELM THE CONSCIOUS MIND COMPLETELY.. leading to 'dissociation' that can range from periods of severe 'delusionary states' to actual 'split personality' forms of mental illness. Bluntly, in all contests between social 'programming' and the Libido, the Libido will ALWAYS win.. for it is part of THE SOUL, and it has the RIGHT to govern the individual. Any form of dissociation or 'split-reality' conditions should be immediately referred to a psychologist or psychiatrist for in-depth analysis and (usually, also) medication to ease the pain of the inner conflict that caused the problem. In time, even such injured Psyche's MUST "integrate" the Libido, in order to progress as a person.. and that means overcoming anything that has condemned or 'blocked' it's natural self-expression.
Only those children who were either seriously injured emotionally OR those who really 'found themselves' during the Shadow Phase (and happily accepted a same-gender sexuality as their permanent Identity) can fail to enter this Phase by the time they are fourteen to sixteen.. though even homosexuals usually complete this Phase right along with everyone else, just to prove that they CAN..for the Libido's drive to be integrated is extremely hard (and unhealthy) to resist.
The individual who has NOT successfully entered the Anima-Animus Phase of individualization will go no further in life UNTIL THEY DO SO. Literally 'hovering' at the edge of heterosexual relating.. yet held back from that by the psychic injuries or negative self-opinions suffered in the Shadow-Phase, such young people are driven almost 'compulsively' to WANT a 'normal relationship life' (which they may over-idealize severely) yet they do not have the personal strength, self-confidence and comfort with others that an integrated Shadow can give us. Counselors meeting such delayed Anima-Animus individuals are well-advised to recommend professional Psychological Therapy to help FIX what the Shadow injured in them.. so they, too, can absorb in a healthy way the traits of the opposite sex.
Unfortunately the VAST majority of ordinary Heterosexuals never really COMPLETE this Phase. If the Shadow-Phase is the source of many possible injuries to the mind and emotions, the Anima-Animus Phase is the source of most TRAPPED or 'sexually FIXATED' psychologies.. which (strangely!,) society considers 'Normal!' But IS IT? Well, it is the CURRENT Societal 'Norm;' and if that is what determines one's idea of Health, then it IS; but it is only the SECOND PHASE of self-development.. and those who remain permanently fixated on the opposite sex as their 'salvation' and Happiness in life are really CRUELLY DEPRIVED of the REST of their potential.
The actual RESULT or 'product' of this Phase is two-fold; 1) we learn to share LOVE and sexual pleasure with the opposite sex (thus perpetuating the species,) and 2) WE BEGIN TO ABSORB THE MENTAL-EMOTIONAL TRAITS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX, through a sort of magical 'osmosis' that Asian Metaphysics calls 'Tantra.'
The way the 'trick' works is simple: WHATEVER YOU LOVE AND CALL 'GOOD' IS REALLY JUST A REFLECTION OF YOU YOURSELF, newly 'surfaced' for you to study. Just as the Id was STILL just YOU even though you feared it during the Shadow Phase, so the Lover is also still JUST YOU even though you idolize it 'outside yourself.' Given time, the Anima or Animus begins to CHANGE even as YOU do; both partners begin to RESEMBLE each other more and more, until one of two critical events occurs. The most common of those two events is A TRADE-IN: deciding that the opposite-sex Lover has begun 'competing' with yourself out of rivalry, you "throw away" the 'spoilt goods' and seek a NEW Beloved with whom you can keep the same old FIXATED fires alive (until they too begin to spoil things by resembling you!) Sadly, this is the "Societal Norm" in all western societies today. Currently, the 'trade-in rate' is every three years.. not a very good success rate for 'the sacred state of holy matrimony!' But there is a second option we COULD take.
The OTHER (and FAR more rare) choice some people make at 'trade-in' time is to ACCEPT THE "TANTRA" AS RIGHT AND NECESSARY.. and ACCEPT the Intermixing of the Genders in oneself and one's partner alike.
This Tantric Choice Carl Jung called INITIATION.. for it DOES Initiate us into MYSTICAL WHOLENESS.
Sometimes it also re-Initiates us back into the pleasure of same-gender love as well; many 'Initiate Couples' continue to live together and love each other AS FRIENDS while they also add same-gender Lovers into the mix of lifestyles they have formulated together.. though that is not always the case. Many others simply 'accept Singleness' as a consequence of 'aging' and drift away from long-tern intimacy altogether.. arriving at a sort of Platonic Friendship Ideal that is less stressful than EITHER option for them. Many people fully integrate their opposite-sex partner as A FRIEND yet manage to keep the fires of sexuality alight by replacing 'fixation on the opposite sex' with simple PLEASURE BETWEEN FRIENDS who just 'happen' to be of the opposite gender. SOME form of adjustment is inevitable.
But a successfully COMPLETED Anima-Animus Phase leaves one A GENDER-UNIFIED "WHOLE" capable of Loving EVERYONE FOR WHATEVER THEY HAPPEN TO BE; and in this broadness-of-view they move on into the NEXT Initiation life makes 'possible' though not 'mandatory.' Like Initiation itself, all higher Stages are and MUST BE a matter of Personal CHOICE and Committment; a committment to HIGHER Learning, and an aspiration toward the Cosmic or Divine levels of Individualization.
Every so often throughout life we each have moments when we suddenly find ourselves feeling ALONE IN THE COSMOS. Oh, we may not really THINK we have no friends or similars, but we FEEL our solitary UNIQUENESS so powerfully that it makes our relationship drives seem somehow 'petty' and selfish. Such moments may occur now and then, only to be shunted-aside as quickly as possible, to get back into the 'happy togetherness' we have used for so long to shield us from that solitary self-responsibility. Yet (for SOME of those struggling to keep a personal sexuality, career and Lifestyle alive toward the end of the previous (Anima-Animus) Phase,) that solitary self-responsibility becomes too large to shunt-aside.
As THE SELF surfaces as the primary focus of our personal happiness (or lack thereof!,) one begins to "see THROUGH" the Freudian EGO-personality. Though it has seemed unquestionably 'you' all your life long.. accepted as simply as the shape of one's body, as a self-definition.. the Ego MAY suddenly become an unwelcome 'hangover' from childhood's silly role-playing. This can HURT, a LOT! Realizing that one is in fact NOT the patterns of thought, behavior and 'personality' that you have spent decades telling everyone how wonderfully LIKE "THIS" you were; you may wonder if you are ANYTHING WORTH MENTIONING AT ALL. This rather devastating yet eventually very healing Phase is EGO-TRANSFORMATION or 'Self-Growth' due to what is normally called 'The Existential Crisis' (the crisis over who one REALLY is.)
As anyone makes the crucial decision called 'Initiation'.. by which we choose to DROP the 'fixated view' that Happiness is a response to sexual attractions, we have actually set the process in motion; now we are faced with dropping yet ANOTHER fixated view.. the view that the Ego is 'right.' Most of us have known hundreds of 'mature' people who still think, speak and behave exactly as they did back in their youth. Whether fourty or ninety, such people are obviously 'stuck in the past' and most of us both understand and pity them for their inability to keep pace with their own aging. But when it happens to US, we realize how VERY difficult it really is to transform life-long patterns, and CHANGE YOURSELF.
"Ego-fixed Personalities" and people still stuck in the past are sadly the 'societal norm.' Because self-transformation can be HARD TO DO, many people shunt it aside FOR LIFE, and die 'as' the same Ego they began life 'as.' Fortunately, there have always been some who succeed at getting-over their Uniqueness, to enter a higher Self-definition based not on Ego but on the Soul itself. Such people impress us all with their 'mature confidence' and an easy sense of commonality with everyone they meet.. for they truly ARE 'beyond mere Ego' in their view of people in general, and themselves in particular. Often called 'a man (or woman) of the World' though they are in fact becoming truly UNIVERSAL 'citizens,' such Self-Phase Initiates may still have miles to go (in their own opinion) before they will truly be HAPPY with themselves; but they no longer EXPECT the world to make them Happy.. and that is the defining Trait of the Self. To all in this Phase, Happiness is NOT SUFFERING FROM FOOLISH EGOTISM.. and whatever they must do to get there, they WILL eventually do.
But exactly HOW do you get-over 'yourself?' Well, one typical approach is by following the good example set by others whom we admire; and this 'hero-mimicry' is a well-known part of (at least early-stage) Ego-transformation. In many cases this Hero-Teacher is simply 'recognized' or chosen consciously.. and used as a model for some period of time, as one 'tantricly' absorbs their traits of Greater-Than-Egoic Self-Identity, but we CAN also discover them in our dreams, fantasies and even in a movie we have enjoyed. For however long they accurately portray where we are personally 'going' in our self-growth, they may guide us; but eventually even THEY must be dropped too, for NO SELF BUT OUR OWN can really 'complete' this Phase. Eventually all Heroes fall away, and THE SOUL ITSELF is all that is left to us. Happily, that is the REAL answer we were looking for all along!
And what IS the Soul rather than the Ego, as a Lifestyle? Well, that is the part that each person must DISCOVER for themself. It will 'contain' the entire original Libido (minus Ego's delusions ABOUT sexuality and self-importance,) and it will be governed not by the Ego but the SUPER-Ego or God-relationship which this Phase culminates in.. but exactly what the 'picture' of Soul will look like for any given individual can only be discovered through a deliberate embodying of the basic Soul-Identity 'strands' enumerated in the Spiritual/Metaphysical section of this Manual. To learn about your Soul, begin THERE.. and then compare that with your current self-descriptions, and you will see the Work that lies ahead.
In the end anyone who actually BEGINS this process fully will normally follow it to SOME SORT of conclusion.. for remaining an Egoic 'relic' of the past would be too painful to tolerate. But whether or not one will actually COMPLETE the Self Phase depends very much on whether you approached the process from a 'psychological' or a MYSTICAL direction. Psychology certainly DOES recognize this Ego-transformation Phase, and workshops are routinely offered for those seeking to outgrow old patterns and replace them with 'up-scale' or "progressive" lifestyle options. Many people find an acceptable Lifestyle in such Encounter-Groups and Power Luncheon-circuits.. though the natural hunger for spiritual Truth is NOT satisfied by anything short of the Soul. Mystically-inclined people (or those who 'happen' to DISCOVER the existance of Mystical Lifestyles and resources in the community around them) up-date their lives in a more directly satisfying (if socially less 'mainstream') way, by actually learning how to re-become the Soul they were born to grow-into. But we each simply follow the path of our SELF.. whatever that may actually be at the time.
From whichever direction we began our quest for non-Egoic Identity, we MAY (though this is far from inevitable) suddenly experience the NEXT great Initiation.. that of the God-Self Phase.. and literally NEVER have to deal with the idea of Self again. For that tiny few alone, this Phase has actually ENDED. For all the rest of humanity in general, the Self may be itself a Goal too high to strive toward. Only the individual's NEEDS and CHOICES can determine that for ANYONE.
If it happens at all, it can happen ANYTIME after the Self has been confronted and forced to outgrow old Egotisms. One may be just out strolling through the village or working in the garden as you have a thousand times before; you may merely walk past a mirror in your own home or look up at the sky from the office window; and suddenly GOD IS "SEEN" TO BE WITH YOU. This is not easy to describe! How many times have you looked in the mirror and seen nothing but 'you?' THAT is how unprepared you will be when you casually glance at the reflection and see not you but your Maker smiling back at you. How may little stones have you idly picked-up and rolled in your hand for no reason at all? THAT is how unprepared you will be when you suddenly realize that THIS is the very Stone which your Maker put there for you to find Him in. How many Trees have you admired without ever once feeling anything but awe and fondness for Life and it's beauty? THAT is how unprepared you will be when you suddenly realize that the very stick you just picked-up is from THE Tree which your Maker planted to grow into YOU.
No, there is no way of pre-defining this; the best we can do is cope with it's aftermath. It does not come to all people in their whole lifetime; and it comes to each in a form unique to their own Soul and it's relationship with it's Maker. But the God-Self Initiation (once it HAS occurred) leaves the individual with FAR MORE than a mere pebble, twig or clod of earth in their hand.. for the specific object (though thenceforth PERMANENTLY an object of holiness and magical force to the happy recipient) is also "just" a SYMBOL; the symbol of Oneself to one's Maker. By this ordinary little object, one attains INTEGRATION into the Life of the Universe itself.. permanently ending the human notion of 'Self' and replacing that with WHAT YOU REALLY ARE on a cosmic and eternal level.
What that is, is not just your Soul's unique, permanent Identity alone, but that PLUS a permanent BOND or UNION with the Universal Spirit; a Union that has been described variously as a Partnership, a Sacred Marriage and Cosmic Twinship. In every case, this Union clarifies for you your exact relationship not only to your Partner-Twin-Spouse but ALL OTHER PARTS OF REALITY as well; for one discovers that the unique Soul-Identity you have is also a 'specialization' of SKILLS that perfectly suits you to perform certain specific roles within the Cosmos. This 'Hieratic Office' or Sacred Craft born into us each quickly replaces any remaining 'Self-interests' we may still contain, and one finds oneself to be finally 'at home' with your 'Self' as never before possible. This Cosmic Homecoming gives us at last access to the final portion of our whole reality; the original 'psychoplasma' of Universal Mind, which bonds us AS ONE VAST LIVING THING with all other Sentience in the Universe. Frequently called 'Cosmic Consciousness' or 'Macroprospectus' this fifth 'element' in our makeup launches us not into another Phase (for all Phases END!,) but into Infinity.. our real and lasting Home.
Islamic traditions teach that each perfected Soul, upon leaving mortal life, ascends to Heaven encased along with their Beloved within an everlasting Pearl. This Pearl represents both the original Psychoplasma of Universal Mind from which we each divided at our creation, and the 'Philosopher's Stone' which culminates the transformations of Self within Mystic Alchemy. Called 'Ain Soph Aur' or Limitless Enlightened Self-transcendence, this protoplasmic 'stuff' from which all Sentience is formed is the only 'place' or 'stuff' (other than the four 'strands' of Identity just described) which is lastingly REAL. Everything that we call 'real' in the material universe will TRANSFORM endlessly, like dream-life (which it truly IS in the long run.) Rising into this "Pearl" as Libido's cosmic Light Body made fully self-aware, we are encased with our Maker AND ALL OF OUR BROTHERS AND SISTERS as well, infinitely. Pearls made of indestructible, Living Light forming a cosmos-wide 'gestalt' or Group Life completely interlaced psychically, we finally ARE who and what we started out to become; a 'God-fragment' floating in a sea of uniquely lovely peers, each with their own remarkable story to share. This "Family of Heaven" (Elohim, in Hebraic Kaballah) explains and justifies all of the little human lessons we have grown through in The Process Of Individualization, as the nursery-room explains and justifies the attraction between the genders; both are lovely, loving Means by which Wisdom is born.
It is the primary 'precept' or principle of Metaphysics that human reality has two "sides:" IN-side and OUT-side. When we forget this crucial fact, we can become 'trapped' inside OR outside ourselves.. leading to profound distortions of our lives. "Balancing" this Inside/Outside division of life is really not difficult to do.. IF YOU KNOW HOW THE PROCESS WORKS. Here it is!..
To "Center" oneself means to go IN-side and CONTAIN yourself, and it is used when one is too 'externalized' or focused OUTSIDE YOURSELF.. on "things" and "doing things" and "relating" with others, leaving no time, energy for and access to your Self. To Center, merely CLASP YOUR HANDS TOGETHER and keep them that way. This channels the energy of your hands (which are what you DO THINGS with) IN-side and focuses your attention on your Self.
Self-CONTAINMENT can really HURT, if you have avoided it for a long time; your habit of going OUT-side yourself will become painfully CLEAR to you, and a profound sense of frustration and INNER TENSION can result from Centering yourself for the first few times. In order to get 'used to' this you may have to perform this Centering Technique every few minutes throughout the day for a week or more.. taking as much of the pressure each time as you can bear. While you are practicing Centering, TRY to focus your thoughts on BEING HAPPY ALONE, being NON-NEEDY and LIKING YOURSELF EXACTLY AS YOU ARE. Your excessive interest in other people, places and things CAN be overcome by this simple Centering Meditation.. but you will have to WORK at it steadily to get results. Trying it once or twice and then giving it up will leave you exactly as your were; STUCK IN THE WORLD AROUND YOU with no inner peace to give meaning and purpose to all the things, people and activities you have used for so long as a HAPPINESS-SUBSTITUTE. Simply REMEMBERING to Center is half of the battle! Try pinning-up a picture of clasped or folded hands where you can see it first thing every morning, and throughout the day while you work, and especially while you relax. Normally this technique pays-off with an Inner Life of some degree of happiness within a fairly short period of time.. though you will have to FACE the dependencies, 'addictions' and other 'things' that have kept you 'out of your own mind' for so long. CHANGING YOUR MIND is Work; and only you can do it.
To EXTERNALIZE yourself after a period of excessive INWARDNESS is equally simple.. though just as tough to cope-with! You probably have noticed that you spend a LOT of time either clasping your hands, folding your arms across your chest or otherwise TOUCHING YOU instead of touching the World AROUND you. Well, simply STOP THAT!! Literally force yourself to Un-clasp your hands, UN-cross your arms UN-focus on YOU; you will immediately begin to 'interact' instead of internalize. And then you will see WHY you have spent so much of your life 'hiding' Within.. for the outer world full of places, things and especially PEOPLE had become too stressful for you to cope-with. WHY IS THAT?!
"Coming OUT" of your inner hiding-place will require you to FACE and DEAL WITH the very stresses that sent you scurrying inside, to hide. Are you AFRAID OF PEOPLE?.. or do you think that other people don't like YOU? Are you for some reason 'ashamed of yourself' over some behavioral or physical trait that you consider just too horrid for others to accept from you.. such as how you talk, how you feel, how you relate or how you look? FACE THE FACTS ABOUT YOURSELF, and get busy MAKING PEACE WITH YOURSELF. Nobody on earth goes around laughing-at or judging other people for such things.. or if the do, they are FAR worse-off than you are! The truth is that the vast majority of human beings ACCEPT OTHERS AS THEY ARE, and only need to be SHOWN or TOLD how someone is, in order to be happy about that.
If you can only begin to TELL THE TRUTH, the world can support and relate with you. Learning not to hide the facts about yourself is half of the battle; the OTHER half is replacing anyone in your life who will NOT accept you as you are. Whether family-members or 'friends' who judge you for being what and how you are, to entire social-groups and communities tainted by a bigotry or bias that you cannot be happy around, you MAY have to stop associating with judgemental people, in order to let yourself OUT fully. Whatever it takes.. FIND PLACES AND PEOPLE WHO WILL LET YOU BE YOURSELF, and stop trying to fit into any situation which genuinely dislikes you; and you will be FREE to be yourself AND FIND PEACE.
Remembering not to simply fold your hands and ACCEPT DEFEAT is really the hardest part of this process; remember that your "Body Language" tells the truth not only to others but YOUR SOUL AS WELL. Stop telling your Soul that it must HIDE!.. and it will Come Out to the world and find a life that it can live OUT LOUD.
While the already-mentioned Four-Part Cycle or Process of Individualization is quite universal to humankind, those born with severe genetic or physical injuries that alter the Consciousness itself must be excused for not following exactly the same process as the rest of us. Being Special People, they have Special PROCESSES to follow.
But before we can go very far into those, we need to answer the question of WHY someone would be born Retarded, Brain-Injured or otherwise Special. Many philosophies have attempted to answer that with theoretical ideas.. but Metaphysically-sighted observers long ago solved the riddle. It is very simple, but MAY prove difficult for you to ACCEPT; for the answer lies in the subject of "Transmigration Of The Species," one obscure though long-known principle within the broader subject of Reincarnation.
For ages it has been taught in Asia (especially by the Hindu culture) that not only do human souls reincarnate as a way of gaining further experience and learning, but SO DO ANIMALS. Furthermore, animals Evolve through reincarnation, moving from lower or more simple forms of life upward through the Tree Of Life into higher and more complex life-forms. Thus, a cow might very well move up in their next incarnation into dog-form, and from there into a human incarnation. This principle is so well-known in Asia as to be immediately agreed-upon by virtually all who hear it.. for Asia has it's Metaphysical Mind "open for business." Western societies, however, are still predominately Logical/Analytical in their mind-usage.. and the idea of Transmigration across species lines is often considered either shocking or absurd.
Well, too bad.. because it happens to be TRUE. Metaphysically-sighted persons can literally SEE which animal species is being evolved-upon through the incarnations of those who are just learning how to be human. We can and do apologize for any shock this may cause you, but we do not apologize for the OCCURRENCE: Spirit has the right to bless it's lower life-forms by lifting them up the ladder of Life by whatever means it wishes. The only thing there is in the whole process to 'pity' is human misunderstanding.. for the process itself is quite lovely and Divine.
The most widely-known form of genetic retardation is the 'mongoloid' or Down's Syndrome child.. recognized as generally a Transmigrating Dog.. often incarnating as the child of the same people who encouraged it into higher progress through their loving attentions in a recent incarnation. Cats too have been blessed and deliberately Transmigrated by the thousands by both Egyptian and Tibetan Masters over the centuries, and many of those first experience life as Hydrocephalic ("water on the brain" defect) children. Other common Transmigrations include Horses (often identifiable only through their physical strength and beauty combined with a learning-disability and rather nervous temperment;) Dolphins, who are often considered 'hyperactive' as well as 'attention-deficit' children; and the higher apes (chimpanzees, orang utans and gorillas as well as several of the larger monkeys) all of whom tend to be somewhat physically and emotionally challenged though fairly bright 'hands-on' (kinesthetic) learners.
It is the general principle of Transmigration that NONE of the lower animals can fit perfectly into human society in a single lifetime; the Retarded human child represents the one "Transitional Form" during which the initial adjustment occurs. This is then followed by a very ordinary if somewhat 'slow-learning' human incarnation, and then finally a perfectly bright, original and individualistic human life-pattern. In dealing with any child who does not seem to fit-into ordinary levels of development, it is wise to at least CONSIDER the possibility that the individual is one of those three phases of human-pattern integration in a Transmigrating Species.
About the only known 'trick' to helping such Special Friends adjust to their new Species is LOVING CARE from those who have been blessed with their birth; and THE SOCIETY OF THEIR OWN PEERS.. and by that I mean both human retarded of their own level of retardation AND THE HIGHER ANIMALS AS WELL; for all Transmigrating Souls seem to "recognize" dogs, dolphins, horses, cats and monkeys as "peers," which (on a Metaphysical Level of development) they ARE. Many cases of remarkable socialization and accelerated learning have been recorded as a result of exposing the retarded or learning-disabled child to the right Animal Friends early-on in their lives.
It is important to ADMIT the 'difference' or uniqueness of the Retarded, Brain-injured and Learning-Disabled.. and find a way to RESPECT THEM from birth as a valuable addition to the human community.. and not some 'sad' freak of nature. I know of no other explanation that makes this possible, other than the Transmigration Of Souls. Without wishing to seem 'dogmatic' on the subject, I offer you this explanation as TRUE from personal observation. Your own trust of Nature's good intentions is the only remaining factor to consider: you must decide for yourself how to treat our Special People. I hope you will treat them as GIFTS from Nature to man.